Letting go

I have decided to blog often, if not frequently. I am not proud of the way I write and it has taken me a while to actually get to this "task". Yes, as of now, that is how I am going to take it forward. A project in hand. If I don't start today, I am sure a year from now, I going to look back to this day, and wish that I did.
No more regrets. All my outpourings, my blah-blahs, my honest and dishonest opinions, my not so great humorous tales, reviews, and all the dramas of day to day life is going to be all over this page.
I also hope to improve on my articulation skills along the way. But overall, this is going to be my space, where I can just be me.
Take for instance, today I was thinking of how hard it is to let go. Letting go of old habits , a cherished dream or a dear friend. Its always difficult. But I have to overcome the fear of the unknown, and step out of my comfort zone.
There is a beautiful and bright world out there, I'd like to believe. I just wish I can carry the courage in my heart to take that first step. I will know then, even if I failed, I tried. I will pick myself up, and try again.
So here I am letting go of my fear. I will pick that phone up tomorrow and call the car driving school :)

Cobwebs

A room shrouded in mystery
The doors have been locked
A long long time
Not a ray of sun, nor a waft of breeze dare enter .
Chaos and clutter everywhere

Here- Rubbish, garbage and filth, fungus and mould.
There- A few uncherished dust coated gems, long forgotten
A fine carpet of dust on the floor
Bears no footprints
Shelves and cabinets -Unmarked and Mislabelled
A pain to wade through

The room cries for attention
 Goes back to sulking, getting none
From the irresponsible home maker.

Today I
Unlock the doors.Draw back the curtains.Throw open the windows.
Soak in the sun
Drink in the breeze.
Throw out the garbage, polish the gems.
Tear down the cobwebs.Sanitize.

Its my mind - my space.
It deserves to be sunny, airy and have lots of room for - ME.

Obsessive Compulsive Quirks

Well I am sure not suffering from any OCDs (Obsessive Compulsive Disorders). You know the kind which makes anxious people repeat a certain behaviour or have recurrent thoughts about them.A very common one being, the "checking if the door is locked" syndrome, where one comes back repeatedl y to the door to double , triple check if the door is locked after leaving the house.And the thought doesnt leave even once he is far away from his habitat.Comes back to haunt him..

Well, mine is the gentler kind..where I have developed certain , how do I call it, "quirks" ,along the way.These quirks mostly acquired , are a result of  "If you do this , something bad will happen" passed on from the previous generation. I am not questioning anybody's intellectual prowess or the ability to reason.There are certain things (in fact a lot of things) which were imbibed by our parents mutely from our grandparents..No questions asked.Why? If you question, you were considered to be utmost disrespectful.
I am sure many a bright eyed child's curiosity of the previous gen fizzed out due to the constant reprimand subjecting them to fit in and not stand out.

Well, I guess our generation is the confused lot, where we were not discouraged from questioning , but still expected to follow many a rule, just because..."thats how it has been for generations, and we never questioned our elders." So we still dont have many answers.

Some of the quirky things I do, mostly out of habit, ..(I am not superstitious..or am I? see the confusion..)..are harmless.Sometimes silly, and many a time, irritating
Some are subject to circumstances, and people around me..In Rome, be a Roman.

1.  I dont pass the salt to anybody's waiting hand. I leave it next to them on the table. (quirk picked up recently..) Why? Giving the salt directly , makes the person develop a lifelong dislike for you..and you also start hating that person.So..if you want to start a fight between two people, just make them handover the salt shaker! Its that simple.
2. I dont ask.."Where are you going?" when somebody is leaving the house ( without telling us where they are headed , of course) Why? You shouldnt ask..Its very very bad.Next time, just try asking, where will you be coming back from? Some nerve I have!!
3. I dont cut any body parts ( for eg: nails, hair) on Tuesdays and Fridays...and it is definitely a no-no after dusk.Why? Tuesdays and Fridays are very special days of the week..there are many a dos-donts for those two days..which can only be matched or exceeded by the other pair of special days..see next point.
4. I dont start anything new or buy anything or travel anywhere on the two horror days..Ashtami and Navami.Why? அது அப்படிதான். This particular quirk is quite a bone of contention between the star tv generation and the doordarshan generation.I am sure there must be a reason..but nobody is telling me :(
5. I really love this one - When my right eye flickers on its own, as it does sometimes..(It is not because some nerve has become excited)..I immediately tell someone, that my right eye is flickering...lest some evil befall.This has many a time, led me embarassing situations in airports or busses or in the office board room, when my right eye suddenly decides to do a jig...and I announce to nobody in particular, about the condition! Well you can do the imagination :)Aaah..and the corollary to the above is ofcourse the left eye flicker.Which is supposed to bring you good luck.So what do I do?Just shut up and dont tell anyone, about my secret..Why not?then the good luck charm becomes null and void..
6. I enter or exit only with my right foot first.When I enter the house,leave the house, get down /enter a car, bus..however crowded the bus may be..I take a sec and put only my best right foot forward..Its Right,Left,Right for me..Why?Well..guess where I picked this quirk from?From the masala saas bahu movies..Havent we heard scores of times "வலது கால எடுத்து உள்ள வெச்சு வா மா".
7. When I do something exceptionally well (thats a rarity) or during a family event like a house warming or a wedding, when you are looking like a happy family and numerous other good occasions ..there is bound to be drishti putting by lot of potential Drishti Putters.Who is a Drishti Putter? Eg: One who looks at your new saree and thinks..wow, that is such a beautiful saree..wish i had one like that..how does she always manage to get such stuff from her hubby? and other such numerous occ. There are many ways such Drishti can be removed...for the various ways in which it can be removed check here.
8. Well..whenever I make dosas, I always make a teeny weeny dosa first and discard it..and then start making the big round beauties..Why?Cos my grandma said so.முதல் தோசை சாப்பிட்ட படிப்பு வராது செல்லம்.
9. I reserved the quirkiest one for the last..why last?because 9 is such a cool number.I didnt want to end with the unlucky 8!(I sometimes feel so sorry for that poor number..) I never look at my refelction in a mirror after applying oil to my face and head..Why? No..not because I will be terrified at the reflection..but because,it will lead me to be born as a lion in my next birth! well..that, I dont mind actually!! ;)

Well there are many more, which I have not listed here,like "dont touch or look at your own shadow..you will lose weight" (If only all the diet watchers and gym hitters knew this simple secret)..If you have any favourite quirks please let me know..also, if you know the reason why you do what you are doing, please share it here.
போயிட்டு வரேன்..one should never bid adeu with போரேன்.

..And the milk boils over.

Again.How many times has this happened to me, but I am one who never learns.
Sample this -
Scene 1

Early morning. I take the milk packet out of the refrigerator, pour the contents into the vessel, and switch on the gas stove.
I keep the stove in sim mode, to avoid ...you guessed right.
I do some mental maths to figure out how many activities can be multi tasked when the milk is simmering.After all it is quite boring to stand there, staring blankly at the white liquid in the vessel, sitting ever so innocently. Calm, placid, with no sign of the erupting volcano..almost teasing me , "aww cmon lady, I am not going to boil over when you are standing there keeping a careful watch on me, am I?"

Scene 2.

• I  fit in  a quick வாசல் தெளிச்சு கோலம் போடல். (customary rangoli on the porch.) ..Check the milk.status quo.
• Decide on the menu of the day.Take out the necessary veggies from the fridge...Check the milk..no change.I wait a second more, scared that the shrewed one will just spring at the opportunity when I turn my back.No..quiet as a sleeping baby.I give it a half smile..and turn to the veggies.
• Chopping of veggies start.An eye on the stove.

Scene 3

The door bell rings.The Martian is back from his morning walk. I rush to the door, knife in hand, and open the latch. I dont even wait to pull open the door, ..I instinctively know..now is the moment..
As I sprint to the kitchen, it seems the longest stretch ever. I can hear the "hisssssssssss" .My sprint is now a wild dash.My heart screaming, "I've got to win"!.
 I enter the kitchen just in time to see the whiteness giving me a wink and a wicked smile ,boiling over,covering everything in the near vicinity,in a frothy white blanket.
Run Out!..
Inspite of my record run outs, I still refuse to use a milk cooker or tetrapaks.The thrilling match continues..only the scenes, and acts differ.But in my defense, I have won many a time too.. :).